I ruined meals. I stepped on Legos. I locked myself in the bathroom sometimes just to catch my breath.
But it wasn’t only hard.
Ruby would fall asleep on my chest during movie nights. Cole handed me a crayon drawing of stick figures holding hands and said, “This is us. That’s you.”
Tessa slid a school permission slip toward me and asked, “Can you sign this?” She’d written my last name after hers.
One night, Owen stopped at my bedroom door. “Goodnight, Dad,” he said, then stiffened.
I pretended nothing unusual had happened.
“Goodnight, buddy,” I replied.
Inside, my hands were trembling.
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